Don't Take Any Wooden Nickels

Don't Take Any Wooden Nickels
(and other conversations)

So they say. And who would
do that anyway? Does it have something
to do with George Washington's wooden teeth?
and what about that phrase
"What's eating you?" like what WOULD?
Is cannibalism an outbreak like SARS?
Or are wo so psychically dead
that the bacterium ready and waiting
to begin their work are jolted
into action a bit too soon, PREmortem?
And sincw ehn is "You slay me" funny?
as if death by laughter is preferable
to life--well come to think of it--
I guess it would be a pretty good way
to go, similar to dying while getting
a bit of nookie, at least for the nooker,
though not so nice for the nook-ee--
can you imagine going at it only to discover--
well, let's not even go THERE--you'd have
to drink a lot of giggle water to get over
that experience. Imagine the headlines:
Joe Brooks dies while being zozzled
by his wife, girlfriend, boyfriend, etc.
That's one torpedo he never saw coming,
no pun intended. After that
I guess you'd just have to have another drink,
and then another and next day a bit of the hair
of the dog that bit you before until, well--
might as well get up and iron your shoelaces
or cast a kitten in your next movie as start all over again.
But that's the whole point, isn't it?
Starting over again? Bye!
I have to go see a man about a dog.