tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13358346.post116353155294969532..comments2023-10-10T11:56:24.878-05:00Comments on cafe' cafe': for a boy i used / to knowAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08195202743154382432noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13358346.post-1163737672382622062006-11-16T23:27:00.000-05:002006-11-16T23:27:00.000-05:00thank you helmit is definite leea west coast poemi...thank you helm<BR/>it is definite lee<BR/>a west coast poem<BR/><BR/><BR/>i appreciate your comments<BR/><BR/>maybe that last line is really<BR/>the title / / <BR/><BR/>my usual thing is to take <BR/>the last line i write <BR/>& use it as the title<BR/><BR/>this was called cigarettes & speed<BR/>i think i sent it out for publication but it got reject ed<BR/><BR/>one has to wonder if the original <BR/>title had any thing to do with it<BR/><BR/>i changed it up a bit / <BR/><BR/>& tried to do a play on words <BR/>with the word "used" in title<BR/><BR/>that wasn't a line in the poem btw<BR/><BR/><BR/>i think / i should be pull ing out<BR/>old work / & may be try some <BR/>edit ing / some times i actually<BR/>enjoy the process / it's also nice <BR/>to get some positive feed back / so thank you again <BR/><BR/>~jx666poetry-finchnothttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09182642674574512863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13358346.post-1163703113780811142006-11-16T13:51:00.000-05:002006-11-16T13:51:00.000-05:00We're always our own harshest critics. I am a fan...We're always our own harshest critics. I am a fan of your style and writing.<BR/><BR/>This has a west coast feel to it. I might drop the last line, as it leaves the reader hanging on the word 'home' and what it means to them, the writer and the skater boy.<BR/><BR/>Helm.hwfhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06487683110705875482noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13358346.post-1163627842973063082006-11-15T16:57:00.000-05:002006-11-15T16:57:00.000-05:00thank you diegoi'm all ways pleased to hear fromyo...thank you diego<BR/><BR/>i'm all ways pleased to hear from<BR/>you / you stroke my ego / lol<BR/><BR/>the truth is / / if you didn't comment<BR/>i prolly would get any comments<BR/><BR/>i'm never sure about my work<BR/>if it's just my own illusion<BR/>that makes me think the work has<BR/>any redeem ing quality<BR/><BR/>this is an old poem i found when<BR/>i cleaned out my office a last week<BR/><BR/>funny where things hide . . .<BR/><BR/><BR/>~jx666poetry-finchnothttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09182642674574512863noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-13358346.post-1163570039287930002006-11-15T00:53:00.000-05:002006-11-15T00:53:00.000-05:00You changed this a bit since I last read it, I not...You changed this a bit since I last read it, I noticed a couple more slashes here and there. Hah!<BR/><BR/>Okay for real now. You changed "In the rain" to be by itself. I like it better like this, much more powerful. Love the style and originality Jenn.CSOChttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08926466078905987563noreply@blogger.com